" I really wish I could tell you what I am thinking "
It was an ordinary morning in the classroom. I was busy cutting and pasting some stuff to decorate the newly painted room when my ID ( Intellectually Disabled this is how Mentally Retarded labeled nowadays) student approached and asked me this: Ma'am, bakit ba kami tinawag na special? I was surprised a bit then abruptly returned composure and answered him with a smile. "Kasi you are normal children who need special attention". He smiled and asked me again. "Ano yun ma'am?" "Hahahahahaha... ang sabi ko kaya special kasi may mga bagay na kelangan nyo, kelangan iparamdam sa inyo, kelangan ituro sa inyo, kelangan ibigay sa inyo dahil kung wala ang mga ito hmmmmm baka di nyo matutunan ang mga bagay na dapat nyo matutunan." He smiled again and said, " Ang haba naman ng paliwanag ma'am, siguro kaya kami tinawag na special kasi kulang-kulang kami". Those words broke my heart. I didn't know how to answer it; how would I react; what would I say. What I just remembered that time was the world momentarily stopped. I couldn't recall if I smiled or stared at him what I just knew was that this kid needed an answer and I needed to answer him. I needed to give him a clear definition of the word special; I needed to make him feel that he despite his disability is still loved by the people around him.
He did not wait for an answer. He left me and joined his other classmates who were at that time busy laughing and doing some activities. He left me and didn't even look back as if nothing bothered him. I just thought that maybe that question just struck his mind that after he asked he forgot about it. I just grabbed my notepad and wrote what had happened that day for the anecdotal record.
I was so restless. I can't imagine how their parents made them feel so loved. The acceptance stage for sure was the most difficult one, but the parents love their children so much. I wish I can tell these children what I feel, and can say the things they needed to hear.
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